Yesterday I received a letter from the Coroner’s Office in the County where my son took his life. It was regarding claiming the semi-automatic rifle that my son used to kill himself. Otherwise, I could complete a property destruction form, and they would destroy the gun.
How did I feel receiving this reminder of my son’s death? I felt surprisingly neutral. I think that he made the best decision possible for what he considered to be his options and knowing the effect of his illness on the people he loved.
I wish he had considered the BEAM surgery as one of the options; we did not have enough information at that time to convince him. My son’s soul has moved on and I am at peace. I only wish to add this option to the considerations a person with schizophrenia now would contemplate.
‘Everything you see around you will one day disappear, except love, which lasts forever.’ Hafiz (Persian sufi poet)