Only the Difficult is Worth Doing


“I think things are worth doing
because they are difficult.
We do things not to achieve
something on the outside but to develop
something on the inside. We must push our
boundaries of what we know
or don’t know about the world
and ourselves. I may have not
achieved much at the time of
death, but I have at least lived
the life worth living”

 Marco Joshua Alfonso         June 3rd 1993 to July 28th 2014

‘I think things are worth doing because they are difficult.’ This was the first line of a poem my son Marco wrote for us before taking his life in July of 2014. Somehow, taking his own life was the most difficult thing he ever had to do. He did it to save himself and his loved ones from the compromised life he experienced while on antipsychotic drugs for the disease schizophrenia.

I wish to pay tribute to the gallant efforts my son made to rise above his difficulties in his life and especially, schizophrenia, and how he continued to pursue his dreams against all odds. This blog is dedicated to him

My son respected credentials and knowledge because that was what he strived to achieve. He listened to his doctor and strived to make the drugs work. In the end he lost his spirit to live. This was a result of both the drugs and the disease schizoaffective disorder.

My son knew about a treatment in Ecuador for schizophrenia, but didn’t have the drive to go toward it while he was still able. This blog is dedicated to making this treatment known and discussing the facts about antipsychotic drugs and their prescribing.

Every day I will offer some insight into the antipsychotic regimen and an insight into BEAM, an alternative treatment for schizophrenia. If you are suffering with schizophrenia now, know that you are not alone and that you have a right to a life worth living.

Please respond with any questions or comments you have for each post. My hope is that this will become an interactive sounding board for those with schizophrenia and for parents of those with schizophrenia.

I hope that my son’s spirit will continue to reside within me and that he will be proud of my efforts to hold to the difficult.  I Love you, Marco; I always will.


Suzanne Patterson, proud mother of Marco Joshua Alfonso

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